


The Insomnolence Game

by enchantedsleeper



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Huddling for Warmth (sort of), Inspired By Tumblr, Post-Episode: s12e02 Spyfall Part 2, Thasmin fluffiness, The TARDIS is a good wingwoman (wingship?), The TARDIS is basically a spaceship version of the Room of Requirement
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-01
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:35:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22514851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enchantedsleeper/pseuds/enchantedsleeper
Summary: In the aftermath of everything that happens with Daniel Barton, the Kasaavin, and the-man-who-wasn't-O, the Doctor isn't sleeping. Yaz, Graham and Ryan take it upon themselves to try and persuade her to take a break.Inspired bythis post by 13thdoctorshitpostson Tumblr.
Relationships: Thirteenth Doctor & Yasmin Khan & Graham O'Brien & Ryan Sinclair, Thirteenth Doctor/Yasmin Khan
Comments: 19
Kudos: 129





	The Insomnolence Game

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote my second Series 12 ficlet! *jazz hands* This was inspired by [this Incorrect Doctor Who Quotes](https://13thdoctorshitposts.tumblr.com/post/190383344356/thirteenth-doctor-incorrect-quotes) post, which gave me the idea of the fam all taking it in turns to try and persuade the Doctor to get some sleep. I set it after Spyfall Part 2 because I can't even deal with the additional WTFery that Fugitive of the Judoon handed to us, although it's got a similar vibe to that and I can imagine it taking place post-the most recent episode as well.
> 
> I did some research into whether Time Lords do actually sleep and concluded it's one of those things that's more or less up for grabs (basically, the narrative as to whether they do and how much seems to change all the time xD), so my version is that the Doctor only needs a full night's sleep every week or so, but she does need sleep. I changed Graham's dialogue from the post that inspired this a little to fit with that.
> 
> "Insomnolence" is a word meaning "sleeplessness or insomnia".

There’s a noticeable change in the Doctor after the business with Daniel Barton and the Kasaavin – and after the man who called himself O, but turned out to be some maniac from the Doctor's home planet, shows up.  
  
The Doctor alternates between being moody and withdrawn and alive with restless energy, constantly in motion. She’s always been energetic, but unlike before, when she’d been fizzing with ideas and enthusiasm, now it seems like she just can’t let herself stop. Like if she stops, everything will come crashing down on her.  
  
She also isn’t sleeping.  
  
Early on, Yaz had asked her slightly jokingly whether she ever slept, after waking more than a few times in the middle of the night to find her pacing the control room, or once, inexplicably, waltzing down the hallway.  
  
“About once a week,” the Doctor had replied brightly, in that way that always left them unsure as to whether she was joking.  
  
(“She did sleep when we met her, I remember. She was asleep on our sofa for ages,” Ryan had insisted at the time.  
  
“Yeah, but wasn't she like, ill or something?” Graham pointed out).  
  
Whatever the finer points of – what had the Doctor called herself? A “Time Lord”? – physiology, the Doctor is clearly exhausted. Sometimes she seems as though she’s barely holding herself upright; other times she’ll trail off in the middle of a sentence and frown, as if she can’t remember what they’ve been talking about. She’s also snappish and prone to bouts of moodiness.  
  
When Yaz catches her rubbing her hand across her eyes one evening (well, what passes for evening in the middle of space) she asks, tentatively, if it might be a good idea for the Doctor to have a rest.  
  
“No, no!” the Doctor replies immediately, straightening up so fast Yaz almost expects to hear her spine crack. “Rest, who needs a rest? No time for that – we’ve got things to do! Yaz, come and look at this!”  
  
Unable to resist the Doctor’s eager tone, Yaz goes over to look at what the Doctor is pointing to. On the way, she throws Ryan and Graham a meaningful wide-eyed look. _We’ve got to do something about this,_ she telegraphs to them.  
  
“Hey, Doc,” Graham says, catching the look. “Truth or dare?”  
  
The Doctor’s head immediately pops up with interest. “Truth!”  
  
That’s a new one, from someone who’s always been so reticent to tell them anything at all, Yaz thinks.  
  
“How long is it since you last slept?”  
  
The Doctor scrunches up her face, clearly regretting her choice of challenge. “Dare,” she says instead.  
  
“I dare you to go to sleep,” Graham says.  
  
“I don't like this game,” the Doctor complains. “From now on, no more Truth or Dare games on board my TARDIS.”  
  
“Oh, c’mon, Doc, it’s just a bit of fun,” Graham says.  
  
“I see what this is,” the Doctor says, pointing theatrically and accusingly at Yaz and then Graham, and then Ryan before seeming to realise he hasn’t done anything yet. “This is a conspiracy. A sleep conspiracy!”  
  
Graham shakes his head, and Ryan rolls his eyes. “It's not a conspiracy. We’re just worried about you!” says Yaz.  
  
“Stop worrying! Worrying gives you wrinkles!” the Doctor says, which again, is immensely hypocritical considering how often Yaz has caught her brooding lately. “Now, is anyone going to appreciate what I've done with the thermodynamic regulator, or not?”  
  
After Yaz has made appreciative noises over the Doctor’s genius, Ryan says in an undertone, “Let's try again later.”  
  
Yaz nods. The Doctor has all but confirmed that her lack of sleep isn’t just absent-mindedness, and now Yaz is even more sure that they need to get to the bottom of whatever it is that’s bothering her. She’s worried, and she has a feeling they’ll all be better off for it.  
  
Especially the Doctor.

* * *

Ryan is the next to try. Yaz is a little confused at first when she comes into what the three of them have nicknamed the “chillout room” – a wide, light room with beanbags and cushions scattered everywhere – to find Ryan and the Doctor sitting cross-legged on a pair of cushions, Ryan dressed in loose clothing. (The Doctor, of course, is wearing the same outfit she always does. Doesn’t she need to wash it? Yaz files that one away for future consideration).  
  
“Me Nan used to do a lot of this type of stuff, and she made me do it with her for a bit,” Ryan is saying earnestly to the Doctor. “She called it ‘mindfulness’.”  
  
The Doctor nods seriously. “Mind fullness? I can relate to that. My mind is very full.”  
  
Ryan looks as though he’s considering correcting the Doctor on what ‘mindfulness’ is, then decides against it. “Yeah, so it helps if you close your eyes,” he instructs. The Doctor does so, then immediately opens one of them. “And then you focus on your surroundings…”  
  
“Hey, Yaz is here! Yaz, come and join us!” The Doctor enthuses, brandishing an arm at her. “We’re doing mind fullness,” she says importantly.  
  
Yaz suppresses a laugh, which is made more difficult by the look of resignation on Ryan’s face at the fact that the Doctor is already distracted. “Sure, yeah, come and join in.”  
  
“I’m not really dressed for it,” Yaz says, because she’s wearing a fairly stiff pair of new jeans, but she walks over and sits down on a nearby cushion. “Okay, go on, Ryan.” She closes her eyes obligingly.  
  
“Right, so you want to bring your attention slowly to your surroundings…”  
  
Ryan talks them through a sort of guided meditation with a focus on breathing and being aware of your body and your surroundings, and letting thoughts pass through your mind without fixating on them. Yaz finds the last one tricky, but it’s a relaxing exercise and surprisingly nice to start the day with. She wonders if they could make it a regular thing.  
  
“And when you’re ready, open your eyes,” Ryan instructs. Yaz does so. It doesn’t take long to realise that someone is missing from the room. “There, did you- wait, where did the Doctor go?”  
  
Yaz sighs. “She must have left at some point. I didn’t hear her go, but I was paying attention to you. It was really good stuff!” she adds, but Ryan’s shoulders slump.  
  
“That’s nice, but it was supposed to be for the Doctor. Can’t she sit still for anything?”  
  
Yaz grimaces sympathetically. “She did sit through some of it! Hopefully she got some benefit from it. You know what she’s like, though.”  
  
It’s Ryan’s turn to sigh. “Yeah, I do.”  
  
They get up and go to find the Doctor in the main control room. She’s wearing a pair of goggles and tinkering with something, and looks like she’s been there for a while.  
  
“Hey, you two!” she says as she spots them. “Sorry, I didn’t want to disturb ya, so I left really quietly.”  
  
“You weren’t supposed to leave at all,” Ryan tells her, folding his arms. The Doctor ducks her head, looking for all the world like a schoolchild being told off, and Yaz presses her lips together to hide a grin. “How long have you been in here?”  
  
“Er, about ten minutes?”  
  
“It was a ten-minute meditation!”  
  
“Fifteen minutes, then. No wait, that’s the wrong way. Five minutes?”  
  
Ryan sighs.  
  
“Sorry, it’s just, I started thinking about the co-ordinate increment modifier and how we’ve always been those few degrees of latitude off when we land recently, and it got me wondering if I could improve it by-”  
  
Ryan holds up a hand. “I get it. Mind fullness, like you said.”  
  
“Exactly!” the Doctor agrees brightly. “I did enjoy the sitting-down bit, though, for a few minutes. It was very peaceful.”  
  
Ryan shakes his head. As he walks past Yaz, he mutters, “I tried.” Yaz gives him a sympathetic smile.  
  
“Hey! Yaz, could you pass me the pliers with the blue handles?” the Doctor chirps, oblivious. “They should be on the floor, er… somewhere.”

* * *

Which makes it Yaz’s turn. She gives it a few days before she makes an attempt, because the Doctor isn’t stupid (absolutely the opposite - she’s one of the most perceptive people Yaz has ever met, except when it comes to her own wellbeing). So, despite the meaningful looks from Ryan and Graham, she bides her time, until one night when it’s late and the men have gone to bed, and it’s just her and the Doctor, who is doing something complicated at the TARDIS console and talking to the ship as she does it.  
  
Yaz herself has never tried addressing the ship, but the Doctor does it all the time, asking the TARDIS for favours, bantering with and cajoling her, and sometimes Yaz could swear that the layout of the ship changes and simplifies itself when she’s lost, or unexpectedly produces things they need when they most need them. So Yaz gives it a go, hurrying down a corridor that is entirely composed of storage cupboards. “I need something really soft, like, a big fluffy blanket,” she murmurs, and then opens one of the cupboards. A beautifully soft blanket, coloured TARDIS blue, is sitting on a shelf.  
  
“Thank you!” Yaz whispers in delight, and hurries back to the control room with it.  
  
Peering into the room, she checks to make sure the Doctor is absorbed in her work and then slyly sets the blanket down a little way away. Then she wanders casually over to the Doctor’s workstation.  
  
“What’re you up to?”  
  
The Doctor jumps a little, but looks delighted. “Yaz! I thought you’d gone to bed.” This close, Yaz can see dark circles under the Doctor’s eyes, which only solidifies her resolve. Fortunately, the TARDIS is right there with her, and Yaz suddenly feels the temperature in the control room drop by several degrees.  
  
“Didn’t feel like going yet,” she replies truthfully, and then shivers.  
  
The Doctor frowns in concern. “Are you cold? Damn it, did I do something to the ambient temperature regulator _again?_ Hold on, let me just…”  
  
“It’s fine,” Yaz interrupts her before she can get lost in Technobabble Land. “I’ll just er… find an extra layer to put on or something…” She pretends to cast around. “Ah! Looks like there’s a blanket over here.”  
  
“Really? That’s weird, I didn’t think we had any blankets,” the Doctor says, craning her neck around to look.  
  
Yaz comes back over with the blanket, draping it over her shoulders. She looks at the Doctor, who seems unfazed by the temperature. “Aren’t you cold?”  
  
The Doctor shrugs her shoulders easily. “I’m a Time Lord - core body temperature is a lot lower than humans’.”  
  
Damn. Yaz hadn’t factored alien physiology into her cunning plan. Still, she rolls with it, wrapping herself up in the blanket. “That’s a shame - this looks big enough for both of us. I’m sure we could share.”  
  
“Nah, I’m fine, really. You keep warm,” says the Doctor, but she sounds reluctant. Yaz sits by her for a few minutes, making a show of enjoying her big, snuggly blanket, and catches the Doctor stealing sidelong glances at her. But of course, it would be far too easy for her to just **ask** for what she wants.  
  
The Doctor jumps again as Yaz tucks one side of the blanket around her shoulders. Like the TARDIS, it really is much bigger than it appears - it’s more than large enough to drape over both of them. “Honestly, Yaz, I’m fine-” she begins, but wavers as Yaz turns her best beseeching look onto the Doctor.  
  
“C’mon, Doctor, don’t you like blankets?” Yaz coaxes her.  
  
“I love them!” the Doctor enthuses. She’s leaning into Yaz in spite of herself. “Love a good blanket. Or a blanket fort… Blanket forts are the best.”  
  
She’s still tinkering with the console, but her hands are moving slower now, and eventually, they still. Yaz glances sideways at her, wondering if she’s succumbed to the pull of sleep, but the Doctor’s eyes are open. She’s gazing into the middle distance, lost in thought, like the weight of the world is resting on her shoulders.  
  
Yaz throws caution into the wind and snuggles into the Doctor’s side a bit more. The Doctor looks down at her with a slight smile, and then slowly, rests her cheek on top of Yaz’s head with a sigh. Yaz almost stops breathing.  
  
“You did this on purpose, didn’t you?” the Doctor murmurs. Yaz doesn’t see the point in pretending.  
  
“Yeah, pretty much. You look like you need it.”  
  
The Doctor sighs again, a long, slow exhale. “Yaz?”  
  
“Mmm?” Yaz can feel sleep beginning to creep over her, too, gradually and inexorably. She thinks it would be nice to fall asleep like this, leaning into the Doctor. Just for a little while. To pretend that this is something that she can have.  
  
“I don’t want to fall asleep.”  
  
Yaz wakes up then, her eyes fluttering open. The Doctor has gone tense against her. “Why not?” she asks carefully. She’d forgotten, carried away by the apparent success of her plan, that there was a reason that the Doctor hadn’t been sleeping - one she hadn’t yet got to the bottom of.  
  
The Doctor’s words are almost too quiet to hear. “Because when I close my eyes, I can see it.”  
  
“See what?”  
  
“Gallifrey. My home. Burning.”  
  
A chill goes through Yaz at the way the Doctor says those words. She doesn’t know if this is a fear of the Doctor’s, a memory, or a possible present or future, but either way, it sounds very real to her.  
  
Yaz finds the Doctor’s hand under the blanket and squeezes it. “We won’t let that happen. We’ll stop it.”  
  
“It’s already happened,” the Doctor murmurs.  
  
“We’ll find a way to fix it,” Yaz says, quiet but with as much certainty as she can inject. “We will, Doctor. You’re not on your own. You don’t have to carry everything by yourself.”  
  
She feels the Doctor’s cheek move a little against her head, and imagines her sad smile. “I’ve spent a very long time doing just that.”  
  
Yaz reaches for the right words to convince the Doctor that it’s okay to stop for a bit and rest. That she can close her eyes without fear. “I know I can’t change what’s happened,” she says slowly. “I can’t magically make everything better. But if it helps at all… I’ll be here next to you. For as long as you need.”  
  
The Doctor’s hand slips out of her grasp, and for a minute Yaz is afraid she’s said the wrong thing, or made the Doctor pull away. But in the next second the Doctor’s arm is winding around her shoulders and hugging her close. “Thank you, Yaz,” the Doctor murmurs, and Yaz can hear the sleep in her voice, feel her relaxing against her shoulder. She relaxes too, letting herself drift into the darkness.  
  
She definitely imagines the light touch of the Doctor’s lips pressing against her hair. It’s a dream, she knows, but it makes her smile in her sleep anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> *pours Thasmin fluff over everything* Hey, are you guys prepared for tomorrow's episode? Because I'M NOT!


End file.
